The new year is right around the corner! Refresh your creative and spiritual power as you consider your goals for 2015. Here are my top 7 Manifesting Myths and Tips:

1. You should only be “positive” if you want to manifest. Yes and no. If you are someone who’s always negative and complaining, that won’t work. But if you have been looking on the bright side, trying to be “spiritual,” or holding strong and pushing forward no matter how you feel, listen up.

Many years ago, I was upset one day– I don’t even remember why. I was alone one afternoon and I cried and pounded on the bed to let it out. In the middle of my “tantrum”, a yoga studio called offering me a job.

Another story: My now husband, who broke up with me 4 times in the first 4 months of our relationship, said yes and stepped all the way in after I got really angry with him. When we stuff our feelings, we also stuff our creative life force, and we can’t manifest much. Find a healthy way to let them move.

2. All you need to do is visualize or affirm your desire, and there it is.  That can work if you already feel it as so. What happens a lot, though, is we consciously manifest something that our subconscious doesn’t agree with. And no matter what we see or speak or think, our feelings always win. 

This can be tricky to discover, but if you’ve been manifesting something for some time without results, it’s probably going on. One simple way to tell is to affirm your desire while looking into the mirror. For example, look in your own eyes and say “I am a millionaire” (or whatever you’d like to manifest). If you don’t see the conviction in your eyes, if you don’t believe yourself, there is some part of you that doesn’t agree with your statement.

3. You can manifest anything and everything you want. Again, yes and no. As spirit we are infinite. The Universe is infinite. But ask yourself: Do you want to manifest in spirit or in 3-D?

If you just want to have juicy dreams at night or blissful meditations, go ahead and manifest anything. Doing so can certainly be useful for it’s expansive powers. 

But in the body, there are limits. Most of us find that success comes incrementally, step by step. It certainly CAN happen that you go from living on welfare to living with millions, but if you constantly shoot for far-away goals, it can also set you up for disappointment.

Most of the time when we do this, we are subconsciously sabotaging ourselves. I recommend setting goals that, while they stretch you, feel attainable. Achieving them brings a feeling of success that will make your next step much easier. Before you know it, those bigger goals will feel real too.

4. You should always talk about what you are manifesting as if it is so. Yes, do this on your own, and perhaps with trusted loved ones who know you are manifesting– people who can get playful with you. There is great power in speaking affirmative statements in present time.

With most others, I recommend keeping more quiet about it, for 2 reasons: First, talking too much before something has “birthed” can leak  energy from what you are creating. Second, if it’s not actually true yet, people may perceive you as lying and lose trust in you. This can pose challenges in relationships, as well as attract some un-helpful energetic projections your way.

There is also a Universal law that when you consistently speak the truth, your words become true. I encourage you to explore this for yourself.

5. Sex is bad or not spiritual. Your sexual energy and your creative life force are one and the same. Sex is how life gets created!

And so, if you’re blocking your sexual energy, you’re also limiting what you can manifest. By nature, sex is innocent and natural and unfortunately it’s been distorted a lot, causing many people understandably to fear or repress it.

Besides it’s connection with our creative power, sex in it’s loving expression brings incredible pleasure. And pleasure is what most of us need to get into our bodies! Otherwise, the limitations of our bodies can be a drag, and it can be more fun to float above our heads in la-la land, watching our lives go by while other people manifest.

Some mornings, I remember that there’s chocolate in the kitchen and this gets me out of bed. It’s ok. So find a healthy way to feel your body’s capacity for pleasure–whatever that is for you– and see what changes in your world.

6. You can manifest for other people. Yes, if they are also manifesting for themselves and ASK you to support them. Otherwise, this is both inethical and impossible. 

People sometimes think that I, as a healer, have the power to make something go away or make something happen. Sometimes when you’re ready for change, it does take a healer to hold your hand through it, or to hold space for your release. But do it for you? No.

In my personal life, I often manifest things I’d like to experience in my relationships. But when I do so, I focus on how I’d like to feel, and I leave out people’s names.

For example, “I feel so cherished by my partner” works better than, “Arthur brings me flowers every Friday night.” Not only does it honor his free will, it also leaves room for my feeling cherished in ways I couldn’t have thought of! 

7. All you need is your personal will. I talked earlier about the pitfalls of being “too spiritual.” We can also get stuck if we get too logical or isolate ourselves.

Taking action and focusing your intentions are important. But think about it– if you alone knew how to get out of your current problems, you would have already done so. 

Besides receiving support from other people, at certain times we need to surrender to a larger intelligence or Divine will. Some of my long-time clients are pretty good at manifesting, but at a certain point have hit a wall and not known how to get to their next breakthrough.

In each case, they’ve had to step into a space of humility, admitting: “I need x, y and z, and I have no idea how to get there. Dear God, please show me. I’m done struggling.” If you don’t like the word God, you can use something else… perhaps “Universe”, or ask your angels and guides.

This approach brings us into our hearts and it expands us beyond where we were. That alone is helpful! So valuable, in fact, that many of us create pain in our lives to force us to go here. Not needed! I invite you to just get on your knees before you fall.

Enjoy your new years’ manifesting! If you’d like more support, consider one of the “Create Your 2015” workshops or the “New Year, New You” package.