To all you lovely ladies out there who have ever been called crazy, wild, out-of-control or worse– I have news for you. You’re not crazy!
If you get a little dramatic sometimes (and this applies to the feminine part of you guys too), it makes total sense to me.
The feminine loves fullness. Filling our bellies with food, our closets with clothes, and our lives with movement and conversation comes totally naturally to us. Even sexually and in making babies, we are biologically designed to be filled.
The problem comes because most women don’t know how to release energy as much as we fill. Most of us were never taught how or why to do this. And so all that stuff we’ve been filling with builds up and shows up in our lives as overwhelm, cluttered houses, overweight bodies or jam-packed lives.
Sometimes this phenomenon is blamed on women’s lib. Now that women are expected to be good wives, raise children, look good AND have careers–our stress makes sense. And yet I feel this is more to this picture.
Currently, we are moving beyond women’s lib into the era of the Divine Feminine. It’s not just about men and women or external roles anymore; old masculine structures are giving way to more feminine ones. And one of the hallmarks of the feminine is our creativity. Infinite, incredible creativity. Whether we are currently using it or not, all of us women have so much creativity in our bodies that we can make life with it!
You may have heard of the holy trinity–the father, son and holy ghost. Or in Hindu mythology we have Brahma, Vishnu and Shiva–3 deities representing different aspects of creation. No matter your religion, the point being that there are 3 aspects to creativity.
In order to create anything, which is what the feminine does, we need space to do so. If you look at it biologically, we need space in our bodies and we need to receive. And it’s not just about making babies–everything we create in our lives requires this spaciousness and our receiving.
In order to create, we need to destroy first to make space. And this is a natural process–just watch any landscape through 4 seasons. It’s nothing to be afraid of.
In general, our culture is addicted to creating, ok at maintaining and pretty lousy at destroying. But if we could just understand the feminine a little better, that may change.
When a woman (or the feminine part of a man) gets over-full and doesn’t know how to let go any other way, DRAMA happens. It’s so instinctive for us, and if don’t let go consciously we usually explode or implode, one of the two.
When we implode, it can turn inward in the form of disease or self-hatred. Exploding will cause a fight, exaggerated moods, over-reacting to the slightest things, and so on.
I remember before I learned to meditate, I would get angry just seeing people sometimes–even people I liked. I had zero space to take in any more energy. I would drive up to the mountains in Colorado and go hiking alone at 10,000 feet to feel clear again before I could return to town. I wondered what was wrong with me.
There are many ways to let go, including exercise, alone time, writing or talking to someone, cleaning out your closet, massage, baths, breathwork, prayer and meditation. For a woman, these are as vital as paying the rent, in my opinion. You don’t have to do all of them and you may have your own, but do something regularly to let go consciously!
Feel free to post your favorite ways to release energy below.
If you’re curious about meditation and where to start, I teach a creative, embodied meditation that you may enjoy. The next class series starts 4/22.